Almost three years ago we moved into this house.
This house with it’s own septic and well system.
We have not installed a garbage disposal.
And it’s disgusting, I know, but we keep a colander in the sink where we scoop the remains of our meals. Then occasionally, when the mood strikes us or the flies have gotten bad, we dump it in the trash bin.
Almost five months ago we had new counters installed. Then we bought the tiles for the backsplash. We bought all the necessary installation needs. We would tile the backsplash ourselves. And then we stuck the equipment under the desk and decided to worry about it later.
Last week “later” came and Mr. Right decided that before we invest our knowledge, sweat and elbow grease (along with a tidy sum to a sitter while we worked) why not just get a quote from a professional.
Professional came.
Quote was $160.
He also looked with disdain at the pile of sundries under the desk and with a shake of the head informed us we could return to the store at least $100 worth.
I’m not the sharpest tool in the math shed but even I could figure out that one.
The professional tiled our walls and then he said, “In three days spray this sealant on the tiles. Cover your counter first so it won’t ruin it.”
You are thinking this is where the story goes south. You’re worried about our counters.
Don’t worry. Mr. Right covered the counters but before he did the spraying he decided to run errands. Half the sink was covered with cardboard. The colander half. Just a smidge of the colander peeked available under the cardboard.
And sure it was trouble for me to carefully dump out the oatmeal remnants, the cottage cheese remains, and the rice leftovers into what I could see of the colander. But that’s what I did through out the live long day.
Skip the colander and go straight for the trash bin? Whatever. The proper place for rubbish is first the colander, then the trash bin.
Habits die hard.
You’re still trying to figure where I’m going with this long story aren’t you?
Almost there…
Later, after the tile was sprayed, and the cardboard removed and dinner was eaten and dishes half cleaned, Mr. Right felt a good wrestle with offspring was in order.
There was wrestling and yelling galore. Suddenly there was one loud Princess yell and then one loud Mr. Right yell where he shrieked to her,
“You are NOT supposed to spit when we’re wrestling!!! That’s disgusting!!! I’m done.”
And while The Princess was left smiggling (smirk + giggle) at her assault, he came into the kitchen…
wiped his face with his hand…
flung her wad of spittle into the trash…
and then picked up the full colander of oatmeal, cottage cheese and rice and dumped it into the trash as well.
And that is the moment we heard a Princess scream from the bathroom. “My tooth is gone!!! My front tooth is gone!!!
Mr. Right ran to the bathroom, and she was right.
“Where is it?!?” She gasped between the now, slightly bloody but definitely wider gap in her front teeth.
And quick as that we all knew.
Mr. Right returned to the kitchen and stood over the trash bin and looked at that pile of oatmeal, cottage cheese and rice and knew what needed to happen.
I could describe how he dug through that pile of stuff.
How he said, “Oatmeal and cottage cheese and … It couldn’t be harder to find. And there’s gobs of it.”
How after he searched for 15 minutes and I laughed at him, I took pity and declared a cease search.
But why drag it out?
And that, short story long, is how her first lost tooth, actually was…lost.
(And how I ended up with maahhvelously, beautifully tiled walls.)
