Dear congregation that saw me with a police officer on the side of the road directly out of the church parking lot,
I did not get a ticket.
But that would have been a good story.
The actual story is less good.
It involves chaos and mass hysteria with three yelling hooligans in the back seat while I was driving.
I thought maybe one of them had bit off another ones leg, so out of necessity I pulled over.
One by one they started to tell me what had happened.
The Princess, "Well, I was going to tell a story, it's about a movie that we saw. The movie is called Jilly or something and her parents were gone and it was Christmas time and..."
And I went comatose for about four minutes. What roused me was when The Pirate butted in,
"uh-UH!!! That's not what happened!"
Pirate what happened?
"The Princess -(%^)!!@($)!"}:( and then I _)&%$#@@}: and then The Pixie _)%@?<{!!!
Uhmmmm, I'm pretty sure that whining isn't a language around here. Pixie, I see your hand is raised, what do you think happened?
"Oh, well, what I wanted to actually say is something different then what I have to say, but what you want me to say is that The Pirate wanted to say what The Princess was going to say and he thought I was going to say, but actually I had a different thing i wanted to say."
And that's when the police officer arrived.
"Hi mam. Is there a problem? You OK?"
You mean other than the psychos in the backseat of my car? Nope. No problem.
"Ahh...I have two kids. I understand. I just want to make sure you don't need anything from me."
I considered that.
The officer and I looked back at the psychos.
The Pirate and The Princess sat wide eyed in the "reverent" position. The Pixie smiled, waved and threw in a bounce for good measure.
No. I think I'll keep them for now.
"All right, then I'll let you continue on."
And we bid each other knowing nod adieus.
So you see? I didn't get a ticket.
But someday, that might be an easier option.